Looking Back One Year On - Final Post

Well, it's now a year since Venus and Mars and Other Myths of Mr and Ms opened at the Edinburgh Fringe and I am about to head off there again (just as a punter this year) so it's high time I finished off this blog! The show went pretty well. The daily graft of flyering and giving out "I'm from Venus" and "I'm from Mars" badges brought us in reasonable audiences but we never quite sold out. The audiences generally seemed to enjoy the show; partners often nudging each other at the familiarity of it and people thanking us at the end as they left and saying how good it was. Usually there were plenty of laughs but occasionally there was a stoney-faced individual who didn't seem to get it at all. The critics, on the whole, were not impressed. I thought the combination of the humorous approach to applying the Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus concept to characters from history and mythology and the genius use of novelty aprons as costumes were original enough but they seemed to want more, complaining that it didn't really say anything new. So we had a good run but we didn't achieve the 5 star reviews or sell out status that would have given us the credibility to take it on tour or do it again in Edinburgh for a second year. I would certainly like to do Edinburgh again some time though, having learned so much from this experience. Maybe next time it'll be as a solo comedy performer.

The Final Countdown

Well, here I am in Edinburgh and the show opens in 4 days. The dream is about to became a reality! 261 tickets were sold in total for the two Cambridge previews (almost the equivalent of 5 sold out performances in Edinburgh!) only a small proportion of which were friends and family. The ADC requires a stage manager to sit in the wings so, as we don’t have one, I had to do this, which meant I couldn’t watch the show properly. At first I was disappointed at the lack of laughter but then realised I just couldn’t hear it as I had headphones on! The actors heard it all right and came off stage glowing and saying “they loved it!” The second night, which was the fuller house, the laughter was unmistakable, even with the headphones. There was also spontaneous applause for Susie’s tirade in the ‘What’s the Point?’ scene. I was so pleased with the actors. They did brilliantly. I felt confident from the moment I took each of them on that they were not going to let me down but kept wondering if I was being naïve. This has been the smoothest, happiest rehearsal period I have ever experienced; no temper tantrums, no need for me to shout at them to learn lines or remember things I’d already told them, not even a mild disagreement. Got lots of very enthusiastic feedback after the shows and some constructive criticism too. Then came the hard part of cutting it to fit the tight 50 minute slot we have in Edinburgh as it ran for an hour at the previews. Bianca was a great help with this as she had been ushering and sat in the audience so could tell me which bits didn’t work so well. We cut some of the banter, took out the Jesus/Santa scene as that was the weakest and tightened up a couple of other scenes which seemed a bit slow. I also wrote a new shorter Romeo and Juliet scene. This was tough on the actors as it meant a lot of unlearning, including odd lines here and there, as well as learning the new scene and some changed transitions. We then had another rehearsal with a small invited audience of 6 who couldn’t make it to the ADC as I thought it would feel very flat for the actors going back into rehearsal after the thrill of an audience. It still ran 4 minutes over but this was partly due to them saying some of the cut lines and improvising their way through when they occasionally lost track. I made a couple more cuts and they went away to concentrate on ensuring they know the final version before the next rehearsal in Edinburgh on Wednesday evening. Meanwhile, the hat stand, flipchart, stool, giant flower, broom, box of costumes, all my own stuff and some basic food provisions have been transported to Edinburgh in Michael’s car and lugged up 63 stairs to our 3rd floor Marchmont flat where I now reside alone (Michael having returned the next day as he has a guitar course to go to) until Bianca, Will and Susie arrive. The posters and flyers have been delivered and I have been out getting some displayed in shops and cafes. The badges and hoodies are ordered and should arrive the day before we open!

Hat stands, flip charts, dust busters and The Sun

We now have the full 37 aprons. Have worked out that in a 50 minute show with a cast of two who wear 18 (Will) and 19 (Susie) respectively, that makes an average of 2.7 minutes per apron which is frankly ridiculous. Fortunately I am not allowing my better judgement to win and was delighted to see the crazy notion brought to life in the fist rehearsal/photo shoot which confirmed that it’s going to work really well. In reality, some aprons are worn for considerably less than that and some rather longer. One only gets a few seconds exposure but we agreed the £16.90 was justified for a one liner that would be repeated 22 times (or should that be 21 times if there are 22 performances as the first is not a repeat?!). Have ordered a mahogany hat stand from Amazon to hang the aprons on. Am strangely excited about owning my own hat stand. Might even use it for hats after the show is finished! I have also ordered a flip chart easel which I am equally thrilled at the prospect of owning. Only a few props left to get, including a dustbuster space rocket, a cape and a posy of dark flowers that resemble grapes (as featured in the Venus of Urbino painting). Loving the luxury of doing a show that is way more extravagant than my recent low budget efforts, which have mainly been confined to a couple of chairs and a table with maybe a glass or two or a couple of coffee cups, all of which can be borrowed from the venue. Sometimes I run to the extravagance of a newspaper. In fact, this show does feature Adam looking at The Sun in the Garden of Eden and we've decided to use that day’s edition for each show to keep it truly contemporary so that’s another 20p x 22 = £4.40 on the budget! Think I will send photo of this scene to The Sun and see if they will publish it! Decided not to have “space helmets” on the planets Venus and Mars after all as I realised these ideas pre-dated the aprons and were not needed so am now left with a baby pink colander and three blue hard hats (got 2 spares for some bizarre reason) I don’t need. I asked the cast how they felt about this and Susie said she was indifferent. This is presumably because she has never tried wearing a colander on her head on stage. Had she done so, she would have been tremendously relieved at its removal.

MOVING ON

Rehearsals start tomorrow (well, today, actually, as it's 12.45am) preceded by photo session. Got to try and make the show look in full flight for the photos before starting actual rehearsals. Been working on the Grand Apron Plan. Not sure how many can feasibly be worn at once. Aiming for maximum of 4 or 5 but there is currently a scene where Venus has 10 so need to sort that out.

ALL IS REVEALED ON THE APRON FRONT

Mentioned way back in March that I had an exciting costume idea for my Edinburgh Fringe show which I was keeping under wraps for a while. It is actually alluded to in my Fringe Guide entry so I think it’s time to come clean and explain. Was trying to think how I could signify the nudity in the Adam and Eve scenes without asking the actors to undress and remembered that you can get aprons with nude figures on. Did an internet search and found not only those but a wealth of novelty aprons which would lend themselves to costuming a whole range of characters. In fact, this had a big influence on shaping the script, both in determining which characters from history and mythology earned a place and in fuelling playful banter between the two core characters. So Tarzan & Jane, St George, Ape-man and Napoleon all sailed into the cast list because there were tailor-made costumes available for them. For others I had to be a bit more ingenious and engage in some judicious lateral thinking so, for example, Juliet appears in white lingerie and Lady Macbeth in black bra and briefs, Macbeth in a kilt, Anthony as a Roman soldier and Cleopatra sports a kinky slave apron. I am particularly pleased with the scene in which Jesus goes into the wilderness to fast, dressed as Santa. I hope no one will find it blasphemous, I don’t think it is – just funny. The idea is that the actors take off an apron as a scene ends, revealing another underneath (hence my March 1st references to wigs and knickers) and thus moving seamlessly into the next character. Have recently taken delivery of numerous aprons from various sources. Just did another count and there are now 34 in the props box and still a few more to come. They won’t be wearing them all at once, they get to go off stage and restock occasionally. Even so, common sense tells me that nearly 40 costume changes in a 50 minute show is way too many. We’ll find out when we start rehearsals. I also have another 60 duplicate aprons to try and sell at £10 each on an “as seen in Venus and Mars and Other Myths of Mr and Ms” basis. I had to buy some of them in bulk so as to get them at wholesale price. All in all, I have spent over £800 on aprons but have the potential to get £600 back from sales. Apron anyone?

LONE NUTTER NO MORE!

I’ve been rather quiet on here lately but there’s lots to report, the most important news (apart from the fact that I did actually finish the script) being that I have a cast! I carefully avoided this topic when I didn’t have any actors because I didn’t want people to think I was just some lone nutter with a fantasy about doing a show in Edinburgh that wasn’t actually going to come to fruition. If that were so, it would be a very expensive fantasy as I have already poured nearly £5,000 into the project. This includes flat rental, the first two instalments for the venue, audition space, Fringe Guide entry and the few costumes and props I have bought so far. My two actors are Susannah Bond who will be playing Venus in her many forms and Will Mitchell as the many faces of Mars. Both have done shows in Edinburgh before so have a pretty good idea what they are letting themselves in for. The first read through went well and I am optimistic that the three of us will work well together and they will be able to turn my crazy fantasy into a reality. The Fringe Guide came out this week and my entry is all present and correct on page 237, nestling comfortably between The Vagina Monologues and The Virginia Monologues (Ironside not Woolf). The Fringe Guide can be viewed in page by page form on line this year too on the Edinburgh Fringe website.

The Scottish Play

It's 3.45am and I've just written the long awaited Romeo & Juliet and Macbeth & Lady Macbeth scenes which is a great relief. Had spent the last few days listening to an audio version of Men are from Mars..... a few times and making notes, working out what aspects of the book's theories I had not yet incorporated adequately and trying to move towards thinking about how I might use these intended characters to express them. Realised I didn't want to get into the realms of Shakespearean dialogue (as all the other characters speak in modern English) or get bogged down in trying to adapt actual scenes from the plays but just to give a flavour of them with a couple of familar references. I was about to go to bed (3 or 4 hours ago) but decided to have a quick look at the stories in Lamb's Tales of Shakespeare first. I had not got much beyond "Macbeth had a wife, to whom he communicated the strange prediction of the weird sisters" before an idea started to gel in my mind about Lady M being jealous of him seeing these other women. I expect that's been done before as there can't be many variations on Shakespeare's plays that haven't been done before in some shape or form but I doubt it's been done quite like this. Had the role reversal idea ages ago and wanted to stick with that (I'm sure that's been done before too but again, not quite like this) and gradually all the elements - the role reversal, the jealousy and the V & M twist all began to come together. Part way through writing that I started to get an idea for the Romeo and Juliet scene which was to precede it, wrote that as well and then went back and finished the Macs and also adjusted the transition between the scenes (which was the only part I'd done already) to fit what came before and it all slotted nicely into place. Writing is so satisfying when that happens. Just Anthony & Cleopatra left to do now. Must go to bed as it's 4.10am now and I've got a busy day tomorrow!